Confidence is something that a lot of us struggle with, more than we would like to admit.
We are all born with confidence, so why does it get stripped or altered along the way? Regardless of how this happened, the point is that we all have the same potential to be equally as confident.
True confidence is the key to success. Having a confident and motivated mindset is something that almost all successful people have in common.
Communication Is Key
Speaking With A Purpose
Listening to how someone speaks is the easiest way to tell whether or not they have confidence.
People who lack any type of confidence tend to speak quietly and sheepishly, or sometimes not at all. They very seldom join the conversation and sometimes stutter or choke on their words when they do.
If you are truly confident, you speak with conviction and purpose. You will never hear a confident person stutter or mumble. Confident people look you in the eye as they speak, and the way they speak makes them seem like an expert on the topic that they are speaking about.
When confident people speak, they speak clearly and loudly. They won’t speak so loudly that they overpower the room, but loud enough so they can be heard and make everyone in the room part of the conversation.
Additionally, confident people speak with authority. When someone speaks with authority, it usually means that they are experienced and knowledgeable in the topic of conversation, and this very clearly comes across when confident people speak.
Keep in mind, this is not to say that confident people are always right. But, the big thing is that confident people aren’t afraid to speak up when they are wrong. When they realize that they are wrong or inexperienced in a topic, they will speak with the intention of wanting to change this and wanting to learn more from someone who is more experienced than them.
Someone who has fake confidence, on the other hand, likes to brag when they speak. They like to act as if they are an expert in the topic of conversation when really, they just talk themselves in circles.
There is no real point or purpose when someone who has fake confidence speaks, and you will most likely know that what they are saying isn’t entirely true.
Body Language Says More Than Words
Body language is a major sign of whether someone is confident or not. Someone who is confident will stand up tall, straight, and proud. They won’t slouch or look down to the floor when they walk, which is what people who lack confidence tend to do
A confident person’s body posture is also very open and inviting. They make others feel at ease and calm. This is done by the way they hold themselves in terms of having good posture, as well as the arm and hand gestures that they use.
People who are confident will lean into the conversation, and not away from it. They will maintain eye contact with whoever they are speaking to, or whoever is speaking to them.
Another postural sign of someone being confident is showing your palms every now and again when you speak, and using your hands to gesture in a conversation.
Lastly, people who are confident avoid crossing their arms in a conversation and closing themselves off, which is why they tend to speak with their hands so they can avoid this.
Confident people tend to smile often, too. This makes them come across as more inviting and approachable, which is what they want.
Active listening is a big part of being confident. People who talk more than they listen tend to lack confidence, or, more commonly, have a fake, cocky, confidence. Because of this, they overcompensate by speaking too much and not listening enough.
Confident people realize that they do know a lot, but they definitely don’t know everything, and there is always room to learn more. So, they listen to gain knowledge.
A sign of a confident person is that they don’t just sit and wait for their next turn to speak. They actively listen to conversations and absorb as much as they can from them.
When a confident person engages in a conversation, it is not to show off, but normally to ask a question to learn more, or because they are genuinely interested in the topic at hand.
Confident people know that by actively listening and paying attention to people, they are more likely to grow and learn.
In the long run, this will not only make them well respected, but it will inevitably benefit them by helping them to become more successful and knowledgeable.
Empathy & Acceptance
“Nobody is Perfect”
A sign of a confident person is someone who knows that they aren’t perfect and that no one ever can be, either.
Confident people know that everyone makes mistakes, and they don’t judge them for it. They are also not too harsh on themselves if they mess up. Rather, they use it as an opportunity to learn from and better themselves.
People who are highly judgemental and critical tend to lack self-confidence and normally use this as a cover-up. This is why someone who is truly confident would never judge another person, or make them think that they are less important or of less worth than them because of their faults.
That is also one of the biggest differences between someone who is truly confident, and someone who has fake confidence.
Someone who has fake confidence and is arrogant loves to talk about themselves, how perfect they are, and how they supposedly have no faults or imperfections.
Someone who is truly confident, on the other hand, will gladly accept their faults. They know their flaws and values, and they aren’t embarrassed by them, or to share them.
Confident people know themselves. They know that self-worth and self-confidence come from within, and judging someone else isn’t going to help them attain this.
Open-Mindedness Is Something That Confident People Need To Have
Confident people are usually very open-minded when it comes to other people, their beliefs, their views on how they do things, and the things that they like.
People who are insecure, on the other hand, are usually close-minded as they are afraid of being wrong or making a mistake in front of others.
Whereas a sign of a confident person is that they don’t mind doing this.
Confident people keep an open mind and accept that they might not know everything, or might be wrong about certain situations or people.
Confident people are happy to make mistakes and admit that they are wrong if it will help them learn from them and better themselves.
They are able to accept their faults and that they won’t always be right, and this is why they keep an open mind so that they can learn new ideas and things.
As we mentioned earlier, confident people love to learn and continuously improve their knowledge. Being wrong actually helps them to do this.
When they are wrong, they are able to learn from it and expand their knowledge on certain topics. This helps them to better themselves. So, it is something that they willfully accept and acknowledge, and make the most of learning from it.
Maintaining Composure in High-Stress Situations
A sign of a confident person is how well they can maintain composure in a high-stress situation. Staying calm in these situations is often one of the hardest things to do.
Confident people tend to think about things with a very level head, and don’t go into a panic.
Very often, confident people have the ability to mentally slow a situation down, and picture it as if they have been through it before. This helps them to remain calm and think clearly about what to do.
Instead of letting the stress get to them and take over, they act quickly and take charge in challenging situations.
When they take charge in these situations, it is not in a condescending or cocky manner, though. It is simply because they have thought it through, they remain calm, and they know what to do in these situations.
Feelings Do Not Control Behaviors
As we mentioned, a sign of a confident person is that they are able to keep composure in a stressful situation. By being able to keep composure, they are opting for ration and reason, rather than letting their emotions take over and get the better of them.
A sign of a confident person is that they are able to make decisions with a level head, and aren't controlled by their emotions.
This is not to say that confident people don’t feel things like pain, anger, fear, or love. They just have the ability to force themselves to take action instead of dwelling on the emotions that they are feeling and letting that consume them.
Confident people don’t wear their emotions on their sleeves. They have the ability to separate their emotions from the situation at hand, and this is what makes them so successful.
Setting (& Respecting) Boundaries
Confident people know when to say “no”. They know how to set boundaries with people, and as a result, very easily respect other people’s boundaries too.
People who are confident have learned to only say “yes” to things that they really want in their lives, or want to do. They know that being a pushover isn’t going to get you anywhere in life, and they have learned to set boundaries to make sure that they stick with this.
This is not to say that they are selfish and only say “yes” to things that directly benefit them. Rather, they have just learned how to set these boundaries and not let people walk all over them, which is something that a lot of us need to learn how to do, too.
Confident people also know how to give straight answers. They don’t beat around the bush, but rather get directly to the point, and make sure people know what they mean, and aren’t left in the dark wondering.
Because confident people have learned how to create boundaries, they are able to easily identify, and respect, when other people have set boundaries for themselves too.
This is a key element of being confident and successful. When you respect people’s boundaries, they respect you too. You become someone that they can trust, who they look up to, and who they want to work with or have in their lives.